Monday, 22 August 2016

FACING YOUR FEARS

AUGUST 18TH, 2016

Dear diary,
Yesterday, I ran a blood screen for a donor. He was one of those such commercial donors that would sit on the corridor yabbing and bragging. He was plump, healthy looking and handsome. Running a total screen, his results turned out a deadly combination of HIV and Hepatitis B. My supervisor looked at me with a puzzled look on her face.
“This person is dying”. I stood there, shocked; scared for my own self.
As soon as she left the lab, I rushed to repeat the samples with new strips. The test and control lines were even stronger this time around. Dave was next to confirm the tests before I would record and disqualify the eager donor. Here was a young man ,vibrant and eager to sell his blood for a few pesos, counting on his bone marrow to regenerate lost blood. He was still sitted there when our blood oga broke the news to him that he was not fit. Yes, he was told that he was disqualified but no one told him that he had HIV and Hepatitis B. He was told that he was disqualified based on  PCV…packed cell volume.
In medical terms, that meant his blood was too small and had more water than it had actual blood cells. Of course that was a lie but the superiors wanted to stay out of wahala as much as possible.
“ If we asked him to go for screening, he wouldn’t go. He would just go about his normal business.”  I was told, but nobody told him. Afterall, he was but a mere commercial donor, giving his blood not for the sake of saving life but for the sake of money making. If he wanted to know his status, he would go for a complete screening in the hospital; and he would have to pay to the last kobo.
Well, like I told you, that was yesterday and I was scared out of my wits. Going to sleep, I had a dream that was a total reflection of my fears. My screening showed positive for HIV and the unigold was positive too.  So, it was with that fear that I ran to Dave to get my blood sample. I wasn’t sure what I expected but you bet I was very scared. Testing positive has since ceased to be a question of who waka pass or who holy pass.
As I dropped the plasma on the test strips, I looked away, scared to face the results should they turn out to be positive.  In my short time in immunology, I had disqualified so many candidates based on one disease or the other and now as I placed the last drop of blood on the syphilis strip, my heart raced. What if they turned out to be positive? Would I be able to stand it? It would be my turn to disqualify myself. The thoughts of it scared me. I ran to the adjoining lab office and waited for 15 minutes. 15 minutes later, I was on my way to check the strips.  As I looked at the strips, my heart stopped…and then started again.

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